Have you ever asked the question “Why?” If you are like me you ask it way too much! Sometimes the answer is available and sometimes it’s not. The thing I am asking “Why?” about right now is “Why is life so full?”

Do you ever stop and recognize you have a fear of something? As a human we all have had fears of one kind or another at different points. When we were little people we may have had a fear of the dark. Or we may have had fear of strangers. Maybe even a fear of trying new things, like food or activities. What are you afraid of?

This is on my mind today as my husband and I are packing our car to travel to Lake Tahoe. Fear is on my mind? Why? Well, we are participating in a challenging event for me: 100 mile cycling around Lake Tahoe this Sunday.

Fear is a funny thing really. It is simply thinking about something that could be a dangerous experience that hasn’t happened yet but we imagine it to be reality. This description is an oversimplification of our emotions but truly it boils down to us giving emotional attention to something that hasn’t happened.

How do we face fear and call it for what it is? We speak the Truth to ourselves. Over and over again. Truth? What truth? God’s Word to us. He is mindful of our frame. He has given us all that we need to face fear. Good news is: He has overcome the world. So if God is for us, who can be against us?

He promises us so many wonderful truths to hide in our heart so the Holy Spirit can bring them to mind when we are facing fear. Here are two that I am clinging to as I go into this weekend:

“Do NOT FEAR, for I AM with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I AM your GOD. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” (Is. 41:10)

“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected (mature) in love.” (1 Jn. 4:18)

So I would love to know you are praying for me as I face these two fears of pain, (like a crash) and of failure, (like we can’t complete the ride). They are silly to express because in the light of Who God is these fears pale in comparison, but like so many things, if we don’t bring them out into that Light, then they have the power of darkness to overwhelm and hinder us.

There they are. I am facing my current fears. How about you? What are you afraid of? Bring it out into the Light; share it with a friend and ask them to be praying for you. Face that fear and in the Power of Christ, overcome!

“Pray a little each day in a childlike way for the Spirit of prayer. If you feel that you know, as yet, very little concerning the deep things of prayer and what prayer really is, then pray for the Spirit of prayer. There is nothing He would reather do than unveil to you the grace of prayer.” O. Hallesby

“Avoid every tendency away from the simplicity of relationship to God in Christ Jesus, and then prayer will be as the breath of the lungs in a healthy body.” Oswald Chambers

Why is it that we do not experience prayer as simply the same as breathing? Is it that we don’t believe in the power of prayer? Is it that we hold a view of prayer that it is serious work? Is it that we adults make things too complicated?

Actually it’s probably any or all of those reasons and more. More important is the question: How can we get to the place of praying like breathing?

Simplify.

Don’t lose sight of the need for reverence; we are talking with the infinite, Holy God.

Do picture yourself with a dear friend who cares deeply about every word and thought you have.

We have that free access because of what Jesus Christ accomplished at the Cross of Calvary.

Do speak to Him in the simplicity of a child; no guile, lots of trust and dependence.

Sit in silence with Him; give the Holy Spirit access to your thoughts. That usually comes without Him saying, “It’s My turn to talk now!” It comes in silence.

Make time. Push away the distractions of your day by writing them down as they pop in to distract you. Writing it down then frees you to focus again on waiting in silence.

Practice. Simplify. Be still and know that He is God.

Breathe. Regularly. Not only once a day. You really can’t exist on one breath a day. Neither can we get through the day in peace without including the Lord in our doings.

Breathe.

Tomorrow will mark the 3rd Mother’s Day since my Mom passed away. In her honor, I have decided to share some memories of my Mom.

She was a working mom almost all my life; until she retired from education after 38 years. She was a supermom in spite of full time teaching; she taught Sunday School, was my Girl Scout leader, my brother’s Cub Scout den leader, earned a Master’s Degree, became bilingual in Spanish, took care of her aging parents in her home, became a junior high administrator and then retired as a high school principal. Whew! Doesn’t that make you tired just reading that list?

But in spite of all the work, she made lots of time for FUN! She loved to play bridge with her friends, travel, and in later years, spend time with her grandsons! Here she is showing her 2 yr. old grandson Matt how to ride a tricycle!

One Christmas she made a paper chain for her other grandson, Mark. She was an amazing Nana to my boys. She took each of them on a special trip when they reached the age of 11. Matt got to go to London for a few days and then France for 2 weeks. Mark chose Greece! They took a cruise from Athens to several islands and even to Turkey to visit Ephesus and Patmos.

My mother had high expectations for me and I did my best to meet them. Sometimes they felt unrealistic (aren’t all moms full of dreams for their children?) and sometimes I resented the fact that I felt not good enough. But if my mom had not challenged me to achieve, I am not sure if I would have. I am who I am not only because God has fearfully and wonderfully made me, but also because of the shaping of my mom’s influence.

So my Mom is missed. It is still hard to say she is gone. I still don’t always speak of her in past tense terms. Mark was listening to Patsy Cline on Pandora recently, because Nana liked her music. Matt is a history major in part because of Nana’s love of history. I am a resilient, strong overcomer because of my Mom’s influence. I am thankful.

And I miss her….

Do you stop to think about maturing? I don’t mean getting an invitation to join AARP (which came in the mail the week before my 50th birthday, harumph!). I am talking about the growing up part of maturing.

We spend the better part of our childhood and adolescence asking “Why?” of those adults in our lives. Sometimes we receive thoughtful responses and sometimes just the “Because I said so” kinds of responses. At some mystical point of maturity we stop asking “Why?” Maybe it comes when we are living away from our family of origin and out on our own, but often we assume we have all the answers or the questions we have don’t have answers. Either way, we seem to stop asking “Why?” out loud, that is until something in our world gets rocked. Then the question “Why?” takes on a different tone and it’s directed at God.

Sometimes we receive a plausible answer to a “Why?” question that we ask God. Sometimes we receive silence. In a needy time, silence seems so cold and distant. But really, the silence may not mean uncaring, but rather, come closer. God’s silence may in fact be His invitation to sit with Him in our frustration of not knowing “Why?” God’s silence is not God’s absence. He is a very present help in time of trouble (see Ps. 46) Sometimes sitting alone with God slows us down enough to let go of needing to know the answer to “Why?” and we end up comforted with the knowledge that God knows and that is enough.

Do you know and trust God enough to move from “Why?” to “I accept”? Would you like to?

A noteworthy quote on the importance of prayer:

“See to it, night and day, that you pray for your children. Then you will leave them a great legacy of prayer, which will follow them all the days of their life. Then you may calmly and with good conscience depart from them, even though you may not leave them a great deal of material wealth.” O. Hallesby

Today I read the prayer of another and it could not have expressed my heart’s cry any better.

Be blessed!

The following is from A Cry for Mercy by Henri J.M. Nouwen.

O Lord, who else or what else can I desire but you? You are my Lord, Lord of my heart, mind, and soul. You know me through and through. In and through you everything that is finds its origin and goal. You embrace all that exists and care for it with divine love and compassion. Why, then, do I keep expecting happiness and satisfaction outside of you? Why do I keep relating to you as one of my many relationships, instead of my only relationship, in which all other ones are grounded? Why do I keep looking for popularity, respect from others, success, acclaim, and sensual pleasures? Why, Lord, is it so hard for me to make you the only one? Why do I keep hesitating to surrender myself totally to you?

Help me, O Lord, to let my old self die, to let die the thousand big and small ways in which I am still building up my false self and trying to cling to my false desires. Let me be reborn in you and see through you the world in the right way, so that all my actions, words, and thought can become a hymn of praise to you.

I need your loving grace to travel on the hard road that leads to the death of my old self and to a new life in and for you. I know and trust that this is the road to freedom.

Lord, dispel my mistrust and help be become a trusting friend.

Amen

I have spent time on our Spring Break reflecting. I am not the same person. I am definitely different. What’s changed?

Focus. Priorities. Commitments. Mindset. Time allocation. Motivation.

How did all these changes happen? Brokenness–lost my mom to illness; my dad to suicide; my mentally ill brother disowned me and the rest of my family and all within 9 months. A little Job like actually.

Was it painful? Devastatingly painful. Fetal position sobbing and wailing hours at a time painful. Life as I knew it had changed. Forever. The apple cart of my life was turned upside down and all the apples were dumped out.

How have I moved forward? One step at a time as Light was revealing my path.

How have you navigated big changes in your life?

“Let me hear Your lovingkindness in the morning;
For I trust in You;
Teach me the way in which I should walk;
For to You I lift up my soul.”

David, Psalm 143:8

What a terrific way to say Good Morning!
So packed with love! So full of energy when I am often not in the morning! David lays out for us five actions: four that belong to us and one that belongs to God. Hear, Trust, Walk and Lift are our actions. Teach belongs to God in this passage.

How do we “hear” God? There are many ways. Here are three:
Reading His Word.
Being outdoors in creation. Paul writes to the Roman believers “For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made,…”
Inviting His Spirit to speak to your spirit as you sit in contemplative silence. (What you will hear will NEVER contradict Scripture)

How do we “trust”? That’s an action that is like faith: it gets stronger the more we use it. It means we are willing to take God at His word. Trust is so intertwined with faith that it is difficult to isolate. But it is our action item.

How do we “walk”? To walk here means our way of life; how we move through our day making decisions, taking actions, resting, whatever. If this action is dependent on God “teaching” us then it sounds like we need to spend time with God in order to know how to “walk”. Hmmm

How do we “lift” up our soul? This action is referring to another action: prayer. Through prayer we can give ourselves to God; to surrender our day, our family, our plans to Him. Our surrender of being in control of how things go or turn out is also linked back to the action of trust….

What is “lovingkindness” anyway? That isn’t a word we speak to one another in this compound form any more. Lovingkindness is a synonym for mercy or compassion. So God’s mercy is new to us every morning (See Lamentations 3:22-23). He desires us to know Him, trust Him, walk with Him, and give ourselves to Him.

One verse of poetry.
Five actions.
One compound word that is outside our cultural vernacular: lovingkindness

It all equals a lot of comfort and encouragement if you allow it in!