fear

Are You Hanging onto Fear?

October 13, 2018 By Lisa Lewis

Two days this week I came to the computer with ideas about being brave and found I had nothing to say. I was stuck. I told myself its ok come back later, but of course, later never came. I didn’t guard time to write, so time wasn’t there.

I wrestled with why I challenged myself to work through this devotional 100 Days to Brave? I questioned my sanity, my purpose, my raison d’ etre (five years of studying French peeks out on occasion)

I came to an existential crisis point. Why do I want to tell you to let go of what’s holding you back and lean into the unique creation you are? Why do I want to encourage you to be brave, to learn what that looks like in your life, to take a first step?

I want to help women connect with the passions God has placed in them for their good, for other’s good, and most of all, for God’s glory. Click To Tweet

I have been hanging onto fear. Fear that no one will care about this message. Fear that these words go no where, that writing and speaking this message is a waste of time and money. Fear that I’m not listening to God’s Word accurately and I’m doing this for my own selfish gain. Fear of resistance, of ridicule, of rejection.

Getting honest about fear is a bit scary; as I continue to learn about myself through the lens of the Enneagram, it makes more sense why I get scared. At my core, I don’t want to feel pain. I want to have fun. I avoid conflict because conflict is painful and looking at the underside of my emotions is hard work.

But God.

My two favorite words in Scripture. Best search I ever worked through; try it.

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

I came to my time with Him this morning without an agenda. I simply wanted to sit in His Presence and have coffee with Jesus. After I read the portions of Scripture in my Bible reading plan, I read today’s entry for Jesus Calling.

Take time to be still in My Presence. The more hassled you feel, the more you need this sacred space of communion with Me. Breathe slowly and deeply. Relax in My holy Presence while My Face shines upon you. This is how you receive My Peace, which I always proffer to you.

I got comfortable in my chair, held my warm cup of coffee and sat quietly looking outside through the sliding glass door into our garden space. I watched the changing morning light illumine the persimmon tree in our neighbor’s yard, the orange-red fruit standing out against the green leaves. I noticed a finch search the feeder for just the right seed. What caught my attention was a hummingbird lighting on the bubbling water feature. It dipped its beak into the water hovering slightly above the water spilling over the slick turquoise orb, then all of a sudden, the hummingbird sat in the center of the bubbler and began to take a bath.

The freedom, the enthusiasm, the fearlessness all spoke to me in the hummingbird’s hesitation, then the jumping in. As I watched, these lyrics crept up to my consciousness

So let go my soul and trust in Him

And just like the shifting morning light, the awareness of my fears paled in the Light of this phrase.

So let go my soul and trust in Him

I was being invited forward. Come, Further up and Further in.

The invitation is for you too, my friend.

I see your face in my mind; your eyes rimmed with tears you’re blinking back; your brave smile trembling.

He is for you, just like He’s for me. God wants His daughters to walk in freedom; to be able to live as He has designed each of us; moment by moment learning from Him the unforced rhythms of grace.

The invitation to Come to Me isn’t a one time invitation. Jesus invites us again and again and again. You might take your eyes off of Him for a myriad of reasons; Come to Me remains the same, simple invitation.

Learn from Me, watch how I do it.

I’ve been hanging on to fear. I’ve been clinging to things that have weighed me down, hindering me from the life purpose God has given me.

Right now, I’m choosing to be brave, to share my inner struggles to help you see you’re not alone in yours. The beauty is the precious invitation to Come is whispering at the edge of your conscious thought; listen and respond.

Let go and lean in.

You won’t regret it.

Perhaps you’re wondering how to get started? Or how to get back?

Call a friend. Message me. Comment below (I read them before they get published so if you don’t want your comment published, tell me.)

Bravely take the first step.

I leave you with this beautiful offering. Enjoy.

It is Well

What Does Being Brave Even Look Like?

October 2, 2018 By Lisa Lewis

Starting the morning with my familiar things around me gives me a sense of place, routine, comfort.

How about you?

It’s a challenge to get outside my comfort zone to go someplace or do something new.

New-ness can be exciting like when an order from Amazon arrives. But new-ness that requires something from me, that can be scary. If it’s scary then the challenge comes to be brave in the face of my fears and in spite of the pit in my stomach.

That’s never easy. But I can tell you something true: I’ve never been disappointed when I’ve let go of my fears and leaned in toward Jesus.

What does that even look like?

It might be saying yes to spending the weekend with mostly strangers, far away from home, sharing hard parts of your story to show that the surpassing power of overcoming, and growing, and healing, belongs to God and not to us.

In hopes of learning the Way to let go and lean in, after the wonderfully challenging and filling weekend away, yesterday I started reading a devotional book called 100 Days to Brave by Annie F. Downs. The subtitle says Devotions for Unlocking Your Most Courageous Self.

Doesn’t that sound promising?

Annie is sharing from her life and pointing her readers to the One who calls us forward, who gives us the strength and courage to be our authentic self in our circumstances.

Seeing other people be brave makes me want to be brave too. Annie F. Downs

Being authentic, without putting on a false “I’m okay” front, is hard. We fear what people think about us. Will they accept me? Will they reject me? Why does that matter?

It matters because God has created us with a desire for love and belonging. Anything that puts those two desires at risk is scary.

The blank page can be scary for a writer. But if this is the work I am called to do then this is the place I need to be brave. I know God wants me to tell my story so that you can be encouraged to be brave in yours, too.

What is the thing in life that scares you?

Whatever it is that is scary, God has already been there and knows how it’s all going to turn out.

I’m going to keep on this journey, learning to let go of fear and expectation and learning to lean in toward Jesus.

Want to join me on this journey of 100 Days to Brave?

I’d love the companionship!

31 Days

October 2, 2014 By Lisa Lewis

I’m taking up a writing challenge presented by The Nester, because, well, I like challenging myself.

I read about it last year half way through the month. The Nester’s been doing this series for 5 years. Each year it has grown; this year there will be over 1200 writers contributing in so many different categories! One writer said she was going to write 31 days of Disney! I will be checking her out for certain.

Me, well, I’m going to do what comes naturally… sharing encouraging words. I’ll share a favorite quote I’ve collected and/or Scripture; a bit about how it encouraged me and how I hope the words will encourage you! My post directory will be here, updated each day with the link to the current post. For you subscribers, you’ll still get the weekly digest of posts in one tidy email on Monday mornings! No fuss, no muss!

Day 3

Day 4 Encouraging Words from President Kennedy

Scroll down to read Day 1.

Years ago I wrote this quote in my journal. I was struggling with giving up my career to be a stay at home mom. I know, I hear the disdain in your voice, “what kind of woman would want their career over time with their precious children?” I did. I was good at being a teacher. I knew how to do that. I didn’t know if I was going to be good at being a full time mom. I was scared.

I heard the words of Jim Elliot at a season when I needed them. My career was a gift just like my children were a gift. God provided both. He asked me to set one aside and take up a new role; a role where I was going to have to trust Him more than I had before…no getting away with relying on my own strength anymore.

Do you know who Jim Elliot was? He was a missionary to the Auca Indians in Ecuador. In January of 1956, he and his fellow missionaries, Nate Saint, Ed McCully, Roger Youderian and Pete Fleming were martyred while bringing gifts to the Auca. Jim’s wife Elisabeth wrote a book about their sacrifice, Through Gates of Splendor. Not too long ago it was made into a movie, End of the Spear. (2006)

A person who is willing to give up what is known for what is not yet is brave. Courageous.

Reminds me of one of my favorite Scriptures I memorized with my son for VBS when he was little:

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid, or tremble at them, for the Lord your God is the One who goes with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you. Deuteronomy 31:6

I have had that verse come to mind so many times over the years when I have faced the fear of the unknown in my future.

God is with you. Always.

Giving up what is known for what is not yet can be done. Rely on His strength.

You are no fool to give what you cannot keep to gain what you cannot lose.

#1 Investment Strategy for Parents

September 11, 2014 By Lisa Lewis

Our economy is based on investments. Short term vs long term; high vs low yield. Where is the best place to put your money? The answers vary; they depend on who you’re talking to, who you’re listening to. With so many voices it’s hard to know what is truly best. That can be scary when you’re a young family saving for college, or an individual trying to make wise investments for the future. So many variables; so many ideas.

Financial investment strategies are valuable but don’t have the long term pay off parents truly need. You are wise to plan and save; there is no doubt about that. But what legacy will you leave your family beyond the material? What is the #1 investment strategy for parents?

I heard a great message on Tuesday from Sue Donaldson. She spoke to a group of moms about A Mother’s Legacy. Sue spoke with humor and wit but also interjected thoughts to ponder.

It caused me to reflect on my own sons and wondered what I have left for them. Interestingly, within an hour of driving away from the event, each of my sons called me to touch base and ask me for something. Prayer.

It dawned on me that God was showing me what my legacy will be for them…that I was a praying momma.

What a humbling thing, to be shown how one is seen.

I wasn’t always a woman of prayer. I was a woman of worry, fear and mistrust. I lived by ‘if it’s to be it’s up to me’ for so many years.

But God…

gave me sweet opportunities to learn from His Word as I sat rocking these baby boys. He taught me to lift up my worries to Him. To ask Him for favor, for their salvation, physical safety, development of their minds. He gave me words to pray back to Him like those at the end of

Psalm 91:14-16. I have prayed with each of their names inserted where the pronouns are:

“Because (he) has loved Me, therefore I will deliver (him); I will set (him) securely on high, because (he) has known My name.

(He) will call upon Me, and I will answer (him); I will be with (him) in trouble; I will rescue (him), and honor (him).

With a long life I will satisfy (him) and let (him) behold My salvation.”

He gave me a sense of purpose to spend the quiet times like those lifting up my dreams of who these babies would one day be, of the men they would grow into many years in the future. I developed the practice of using my laundry time to pray for the 10 year old feet who wore the once white socks; to pray for the arms that would go stronger over time, that they would become the men God desires them to be.

Now they are men. One is married to a beautiful, Christ-following woman. She was prayed for long before he met her. They serve God in His kingdom building purposes as church planters in Utah. The other son is in college, a sophomore Gator at UF, 3000 miles away.

I miss them. A lot. But God…

is with them, in them and guiding them in the lives He has planned for them.

Just as this simple momma asked Him again and again.

My prayers are not my prayers alone. The One Who answers is also the One Who leads us to come be with Him in the quiet place where our soul can breathe out the burdens and worries and breathe in His peace in return.

God has taught me to rest in Him. He has got these babies/boys/men.

Trusting God. Talking with Him about everything. What a gift that He gave me years ago; the gift of prayer.

A gift of investment. Of time, of heart, of hope. You deposit your meager prayers like I did.

Ask Him. He longs to hear your words, pleas, worries and fears. He will transform those investments (and you!) over time.

It is your #1 investment strategy that will pay huge dividends both now and eternity future!

30 Days of Giving #18: Write

November 18, 2013 By Lisa Lewis

The new and old are coming together in me. It’s not been easy letting go…

I ran the risk of losing something that held value. Like forgetting the person who gave me what I’ve held since childhood; a trinket that has no value other than the memory.

Leaving a place that is full of the memories of life; roads driven, paths walked, beaches strolled.

Leaving is hard. It’s important to acknowledge the pain of loss, the difficulty of change.

But don’t stop there. That’s called being stuck. Or if knowing change is hard keeps us from making changes, that is fear. Fear of the unknown can keep us from growing. From fully living the one life we’ve been given.

In facing the hard and chipping away at it a little at a time the process of change can be manageable. Loss is still painful. Change is still hard but little by little, bite-size even, changes can be handled.

In the big move there were 1000 decisions at least. I didn’t count them but I know there were hundreds for sure! What to keep. What to give. What to sell. What to donate. What to store.

Books were hardest for me. Some valuable for their age and condition. Some valuable for the laughter they brought. Some valuable for the markings made in the reading. We have 6 boxes of books left. I have unpacked one. My journals.

My life on paper from the ripe old age of 13 to present day. I don’t read through them on a regular basis. I don’t need to. I know what season of life each journal cover holds close. I glance at the cover and remember. Ah yes. High School. Another? Early motherhood. Yet another? A book of deep grief.

Collections of quotes, song lyrics, poems read and copied, poems written by hand and heart. Prayers cried through. Praise recorded. Deep wounds brought to Light for healing.

The old and new coming together in me.

I write. The following is from a class I am taking currently:

I write because I have this sense of responsibility.

I write because I was given stories by elders who are now gone; there are those behind me who see faces in scrapbooks but those lives are meaningless without the stories.

I write because I was given the oral traditions of our family and must pass them on to the next generations whether they stop to read them or not

I write because I hold my hand back into the past to hold its hand while reaching forward into the future to grasp its hand; as if I am the connecting conduit from past to future.

I write because I have a burning passion to allow the telling of the dark parts their freedom from hiding that they can be revealed and healed in the Light

I write because there is a holy nudge gently prodding the stories, the words, the phrases out of my head through my heart

I write because I need to

I write because it helps me to think aloud onto paper

I write to process

I write to be free

I write to record my personal Old Testament; to record the faithfulness of God at work in my life and my family’s lives.

My current journal’s cover. It will remind me of this year of The Big Move. No one may ever care to read what’s held close by this cover but I must write.

I’m a writer. It’s how I process life and am able to offer myself to others.

What are your thoughts about writing?

No More Excuses

August 30, 2013 By Lisa Lewis

It’s Friday. Friday is usually a day to ease into a slower pace for the weekend.
Today I am putting a stake in the sand and declaring:
NO MORE EXCUSES!

For longer than I like to admit I have succumbed to the Resistance. Steven Pressfield writes about it in The War of Art, and Do The Work.Check his work out here

I have accepted the lies of ‘you have nothing to offer’, ‘why bother’, and ‘not good enough’ for too long.

I choose this day to place that stake in the ground, to take back the territory that has been given me and begin again. In earnest.

No More ‘I Can’t’

Trusting Who has made me and discovering what He’s made me for is my focus.

A New Ending.

What have you been believing that is keeping you from living a purposeful, intentional Christ-centered life? Leave a comment so I may join you in the battle through prayer.

A Week of … Interior Work

April 7, 2013 By Lisa Lewis

As I come to quiet

I feel … inferior

What makes me hide?

What makes me think trying harder will make me better; more lovable; more worthy?

A week after the Resurrection celebration

I am fearful like the first disciples

I light my candle

nestled in the protection of the glass jar

etched with FAITH

FAITH keeps the light inside

from going out

FAITH in Christ’s finished work

FAITH in Christ’s work being born out in me

FAITH in Christ’s continuing work in me, in others

FAITH in the Truth He’s coming back for me

New Direction

March 12, 2012 By Lisa Lewis

My husband was laid off on Thursday. His work was no longer needed by the company. That was it. No severance, no two weeks notice, just work through this Wednesday the end of the pay period and good bye.

Now mind you on that particular day I was in the throes of preparing and finalizing details for a retreat I had been asked to lead on Saturday. So at that time, my response was “Really?!? What a timely distraction from where my mind and heart need to be! It’s obvious God wants to do a great work on Saturday!” I didn’t melt into a puddle of tears, I asked my prayer warrior friends to jump in and I simply trusted God. I didn’t start to worry about what and how and where and why. Not then.

Today however is a new day and the temptation to worry that is common to us all was present again. I found myself swift to my to do list; taking control of the things I knew needed doing that I had in my power to do. Three hours into my day, after neglecting my regular habit of entering into the day slowly by having coffee with Jesus, I stopped midstream and sat down and cried. I cried out my worry, my fear of the unknown, all the pent up hurts from sudden and uncontrolled change in my life to date. And just as suddenly as the flood came on, it receded. I picked up my devotional, Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young, and read today’s entry:

“Waiting, trusting, and hoping are intricately connected, like golden strands interwoven to form a strong chain. Trusting is the central strand, because it is the response from My children that I desire the most. Waiting and hoping embellish the central strand and strengthen the chain that connects you to Me. Waiting for Me to work, with your eyes on Me, is evidence that you really do trust Me.”

This was a love gift; a tangible reminder of love and provision even when I don’t see HOW. or WHERE. or WHAT. or I don’t know WHY.

GOD, the Maker of the heavens and earth and all created things, KNOWS. He CARES. He reminded me of this picture that I took at Christmas of 2008. It was the first Christmas without both my Mom and Dad. I saw this sign as just that; a sign to remind me that living in the past was just as it reads: Dead End.

In the same way, when I go down the path of thinking about what if? or how will? or why? it’s the same Dead End. The knowing belongs to the One who is Omniscient (All Knowing). What belongs to me is to Trust. Thank you Sarah Young for your writing such a great devotional book. Thank you Lord for Your perfect timing of this gift of words to remind me, and hopefully you as you have read this, that GOD is STILL in CONTROL!

I don’t know details, but I know the One who does! How about you? Where do you put your trust? If you’re in a place of unknowing I’d love to hear from you. Leave a comment or email me. We can be in this together!