Learning Along The Way

It’s Fri-Yay!!

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It’s nearly quitting time on Friday afternoon. At least it would be if I worked a regular job. To be honest, there’s very little regular about me; even when I did work for a regular paycheck I didn’t do my work in a regular way.

In fact, I don’t think like a regular person. I’m far too out of the box and I’m pretty sure God is delighted with the way He’s made me. (see Ps. 139)

I am an Enthusiast. I’ve been in hiding thanks to many hard things in life, but God has brought me back to center. And it’s been a crazy journey of unlearning and re-learning along the Way!

One of the many learnings over the recent part of this journey has been learning to see God’s handiwork in creation with eyes of faith.

I’ve begun keeping an eye out for how God surprises me with reminders of His love. As often as possible I take pictures of the heart shape that appears in random, unexpected places.

This morning’s raspberry on my Rice Chex

The coffee sludge that I rinsed out and set aside to wash later.

The leaf along the path

These are so fun to find!

I’m wondering if you have seen random heart shapes around in your days? Do you notice?

One of the best outcomes of this part of my journey has been the practice of contemplation. Becoming contemplative is the result of spiritual practices of silence and solitude. I ran from those two words for most of my life! I told myself, “ain’t nobody got time to sit still.”

For two decades Silence was filled with the wonderful noise of family. The only silence I found was early before anyone got up. I tried to do that daily, to fill my mind & soul with God’s Word and what Oswald Chambers had to say each day. Those quiet times set the foundation for my soul; they weren’t long times, maybe 30 minutes. But I shudder to think what life would have been like for me when I lost both my parents suddenly, had I not already had the foundation of my soul built on God.

Solitude was thrust upon me when we moved. All the new was overwhelming and I reeled at the disorientation. I struggled with the compounding losses: parents, home, roles, familiar places; everything that had been regular was gone. Solitude became my familiar place. It was hard for awhile, lonely at times, but Solitude is one of the greatest gifts because I learned I am never truly alone.

Now, ten years later, I can spend hours in silence and solitude and not lose my mind. (that actually may have happened long ago, but I digress) Instead of going nuts, I have learned to listen and to see. These are gifts from the Giver of all good gifts.

In this month of personal challenge to

I’d love to have you join in. Keep an eye out for heart shapes in random places. Notice God’s handiwork, like sunrises, sunsets, cloud formations, the smiles of children, birds singing, whatever.

Let’s collect them and share them.

 

So Much Life Happens

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Some seasons of life feel like they drag on.  Remember how long summer vacation was when you were a kid?  It’s still the same length of time between school ending and starting again but as an adult it flies by now.

Perhaps you’re looking forward to a big event like your wedding.  The waiting can seem endless.

As a Mom living in the diaper stage, potty training can’t come soon enough!  Or some of you are anxiously awaiting your kids start of school so you can have time to yourself again.

Just know that it all flies by and then…memories.

SO much Life happens in relatively short periods of time that you can forget to slow down and reflect.  Appreciate.  Rejoice.

I am so thankful for photographs that capture moments and stimulate memories.  I slowed down this morning to look back at the happenings in the lives of our family in this past year.

College graduation.

2 1/2 months later, a wedding.

Senior Portrait for the final year of high school.

Blink!

The Senior year has come to an end and his Tennis coach is thanking him for a great 3 years as his team manager.

Where did that time go?

Then that celebration day came.too.quickly.

And then off on the adventure of this 18 year life time…Europe for 3 1/2 weeks.

Envy is a sin.  I need forgiveness.

What I need daily is what you need.  Time to reflect. To take stock. To say Thank You.I come here twice a week for just those things. Solitude. Listening. Reflection.

The result for me is Peace.

I am grateful for the life that happened this past year.  Joy and sadness blended together. Real life. Fast and fleeting.

I am grateful for photos that remind me. Friends that walked with me. Family that supports me.

And most of all my Lord Who loves me perfectly.

Of Water & Wheels: Reflections on Solitude

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Saturday is a day of looking back, reflecting on the week just ended.  It also is a day to look ahead to the coming week; to take stock of what was and what will be.

In the middle of both I find myself looking at what is.  I am like water.

In what way?  Left to my own devices, I seek my lowest level.  Like water.  It always will run downhill.

I mentioned this week that I am easily distracted.  Actually I distract myself.  Pondering and practicing the discipline of Solitude this week I have seen my habits in a new light, rather like a flood light into a dark room.  Revealing what was formerly tolerable in a dim light to be frayed and worn under bright light.  My habits of starting and not finishing, of having too many things vying for top priority, of saying Yes too many times and having little or “no time” to be alone.

Blegh.

I learned this week that although too much action can be the enemy of Solitude, when practiced at the discipline, one can experience Solitude while busy.  Richard Foster said it this way: “Solitude is more a state of mind and heart than it is a place.  There is a solitude of the heart that can be maintained at all times.”

Look at how two sisters made choices. When presented with a dinner guest, one got busy, the other sat with the guest.  One resented all the work, the other sat peacefully in the guest’s Presence.  Given that much information likely our Western minds would jump to the side of the busy sister who is taking care of the needs of the guest.  Ironically, that’s not where Jesus sided.  He chided the busy sister with these words: “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered by so many things; but Mary has chosen the better part and that will not be taken away from her.”  Mary’s priority was being with Jesus.  Martha’s priority was doing stuff.  Both are necessary.  But Mary has chosen the better part…

Being with Jesus prepares us to be with others.  Solitude in His Presence is refreshing to our souls; like what water is supposed to be to our bodies.

Yet we must take care of life and work.  We must be active.  In reading the Windows of the Soul by Ken Gire I encountered an idea that made perfect sense to me.

Be the still axis.

A wheel can spin wildly fast; going downhill like water, the revolutions are hard to count.  But at the center is the immovable axis which keeps the wheel able to do what it’s intended to do.

Anne Morrow Lindbergh suggests we strive “to be the still axis within the revolving wheel of relationships, obligations and activities.” 

Don’t do away with action; Be the still axis.

Looking at Solitude this week has been a blessing.  I have seen some of my habits for what they are: water going downhill.

I have also seen the possibility of learning to be still at the center even when there are many things to attend to.

I love this summary again by Anne Morrow Lindbergh: “The problem is not entirely in finding the room of one’s own, the time alone, difficult and necessary as that is.  The problem is more how to still the soul in the midst of its activities.”

What have you learned this first week of Lent?

 

Sitting with an Empty Chair

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Nearing the end of the first full week of Lent, I am blessed and challenged by this thought:

In the practice of Solitude is God’s invitation to “come sit with Me”.

Solitude does take practice.  It is noisy in the world.  I make it noisy by adding commitments and tasks that take up my time for solitude.  I excuse away the call to “Come away by yourself and rest” because I am busy doing things…for Jesus right?

He doesn’t need me to do anything.  He wants me to be with Him.  Simply be.

Alone with Him. In Solitude. *sigh* The Creator and Sustainer of Life wants me to be with Him.  That is all.  Just be.

I am blessed and challenged.

The challenge comes in the letting go of my routine, my to do list, my false source and sense of value.  The challenge is to accept that time alone with God, just hanging out with Him, is of primary value.

That Solitude is valuable.  That Solitude, time apart from the world, is valuable to God.

Solitude takes practice.  For me, years of practice. (I am a slow learner).  I first came in contact with the idea of spending time alone with God without an agenda, without my never ending prayer request list, 5 years after I began walking with Christ.  In 1986.  This idea of just meeting with Jesus came through the form of a tiny booklet, My Heart Christ’s Home, by Robert Boyd Munger.  It is an allegory using the illustration of your life and heart as Christ’s new home based on the Truth that Christ lives in us when we have accepted Him as Savior and Lord.

If you’ve never read it, I highly recommend it!

This empty chair is symbolic for me.  There is another one, to the right of it, where I sit.  Every morning when I am home, I get up, get my coffee and sit in my chair to have coffee with Jesus.  My google calendar says that “Coffee with Jesus” as a marked off hour at the beginning of each day.  I love my time sitting with an empty chair.  Just hanging out with Jesus is getting easier; not always asking “please fix this broken relationship” or “please change me in this attitude” but simply enjoying the silence and focusing on the reality of His Presence.

Solitude takes practice.  This season of Lent is the perfect time to practice slowing down, making space in your day, your mind, your heart, to be alone with Jesus.

Are you avoiding this?  What is keeping you from sitting?

Hush.  Listen well. The Chair is not Empty.

 

How Noisy is Your Life?

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Today was an opportunity to deepen community and connect with a group of women in a different setting; my home.  This group meets weekly at our church down in the “dungeon” of the church’s basement where the “Student Ministries” meet.  Rather bleak visually.  But the upside of that is there is not a lot to distract me from the women: two rectangle tables and the chairs we need for our group.  Not much on the walls to look at, not much clutter in the room itself.  So the point of our gathering is to discuss what we’ve studied in the past week.

Today’s gathering was a bit more open and social.  It was nice to hear from the women about interests and experiences.  At one point one of them asked a question for each of us: “What do you collect?”

Now this was a great question to learn about each other.  What do we find value in?  What is cute?

So here’s one of mine…

How does this relate to this week of Lent for me?

I have been pondering what keeps me from experiencing solitude.  This morning my little book asked me to consider this question: “What is the greatest source of “noise” in your life?”  I realized between the topic of what do I collect and what is the greatest source of noise (think distraction) the answer came in the prayer in Mornings with Tozer

“Dear Lord, Help me make the transition from wanting more and more “things” to being satisfied–and overjoyed–with only Your presence in my life.”

My stuff is the greatest source of “noise”.  Cleaning, organizing, maintaining, decluttering, yada, yada, yada.

The things of my life distract me from enjoying just being.  Just peacefully being with God.

My life is too noisy.  It’s time to do some purging!

 

Do or Be? That is the Quest

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Do. Be.  An apparent contrast in terms; but is it?

 

I have spent a majority of life in the doing arena.  Get good grades.  Do your best.

Striving for approval, recognition, acceptance.  Our culture places value on achievement.  We are trained up to fit in, act right, look a certain way, have an acceptable spouse with an acceptable career; live in a particular place, drive acceptable cars.  The list goes on.

 

None of these things or goals are necessarily bad unless the motive behind the goal is bad.  Bad motives?  What would those be?  The interpretation of motives depends on your worldview.  By what measuring stick do you compare yourself?

 

With the measuring stick of the world, the list above will be evaluated by what is the biggest and best.  Who determines what is best?  Your peers?  The advertising agencies?  The opinions of your family and friends?  The measuring stick fluctuates with the popular influence of culture.  When have you arrived?  When can you simply relax and enjoy life?  How much is enough?

 

What if you wanted to change the stick, which measures you?

 

Unfortunately many who choose to walk along the Way as a Christ follower bring with them the measuring stick of the world and apply it to how they’re doing as a Christian.  Suddenly without recognizing it, the life of faith takes on the life of the works focused world and relationship with God is sacrificed on the altar of performance: serving on committees, teaching Sunday school, leading a small group, helping with AWANA.  Again, none of these activities is bad unless the motive for doing them is.

 

What if there is a different way?  A way of living simply; a way of enjoying just being without striving for…whatever?  Do or Be. Now that is the Quest.

 

There is a different Way.

 

Slow down.  Get off the merry go round.  Spend time alone with the Lord, in silence.  Write in a journal.  Sit still outdoors.

Listen to the birds.  Focus on one sight or sound.

 

Be still and know…

 

Follow Me…

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