Learning Along The Way

What Does Showing Up Look Like?

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I don’t know you noticed, but summer is slipping away. It’s August. I used to be a classroom teacher and this is the month it all starts up again. Just look at the Dollar bins at Target. School supplies are everywhere. I want to squeeze more fun out of summer before the seasons change again.

Ever feel that desperate feeling? That frantic ‘I’ve got to make the most of this time’ kind of feeling?

I tried an experiment this summer.

I challenged myself every day in July to

 

I asked myself the question: What does Showing Up look like?

I realized a few things. To show up during the lazy days of summer is different than what it looks like to show up during the work week (or school year as it were).

Less routine is beautiful…for awhile.

Parents start longing for school to start, kids get tired of seeing the same few faces every day. Teachers never have enough time at the end of the summer to prep for all their new ideas.

Routine helps everyone. There is comfort in predictable but not suffocating schedules. How do routines and schedules affect the idea of what it means to show up?

Glad you asked.

In my July experiment to Show Up I had great plans for what I would put in my days. I planned to write and be creative everyday. I planned to read three books, plus make time to garden and attend to all my responsibilities. I’ve been blessed with lots of discretionary time; flexible work schedule and opportunities for creativity or reading or beach/pool time, whatever. Wow! What a gift!

I started well, doing all the things a little every day. Then, a change in pattern happened, and it threw me off balance.  I didn’t make the shift back to a daily checklist. I had created a stressful scenario that wasn’t what fit with my reality. I told myself I had failed. Where did that come from?

It was the story I told myself. I hadn’t stopped showing up; I was showing up differently. I recognized my temptation to have a mean-spirited internal dialogue running. I made some choices. Instead of hating on myself I decided to pay attention to what I was choosing to do.

Instead I began to notice my actions.

I sat quietly to listen to the birds longer in the morning. I lingered over coffee with my husband before he left for work. I slowed my rhythm to a pace that matched my soul.

What if showing up for yourself means paying attention to how your soul wants to move and breathe?

What if learning to live in the unforced rhythms of grace means leaving room for a last minute invitation? Or adjusting plans to be able to help a friend? Or simply sitting still to notice the activity of Creation?

What I’m learning about what it means to show up in my life is a lot less driven and a lot more grace-filled.

How about you?

 

Sabbath Reflections

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Have you ever signed up for being critiqued? You said to yourself, “I want to get better at ______; so I am going to ask others to tell me how I can improve.” Have you done that with someone who is a professional in the area you want to improve?

I get a sick stomach ache when I think about it.

I did that. I attended a Writers’ Bootcamp in 2016 and asked for critique of my writing. I submitted myself to another’s examination and judgment. What I found was not only helpful but encouraging.

That person has included me as part of his launch team for his soon to release book, Learning to Speak God from Scratch.

His work is a thoughtful examination of words that have been deemed sacred in various religious practices and have become words tossed about without the sacrosanct respect said words deserve.

Sabbath is one of those words for me.

I grew up in the ‘Chr-easter’ tradition: parents who attended church as children without developing much faith around the practice of going to church, and who chose to raise their own children with knowledge of the two “important” Christian holidays of Christmas and Easter. I heard the important stories of God and Jesus, but missed the why of value in knowing about them.

Head versus Heart. Religion versus Faith.

I came to faith in Christ at 23 after a lot of searching for love in all the wrong places. I was standing outside at Aztec Center near midnight, sweeping the patio and emptying trash cans; the duties of a night job I had while I was pursuing my teaching credential. I stood silent on a cold February night looking up at the stars and simply asked, “If you’re real God, would you let me know?”

The response was equally silent but immediate: two stars that were parallel and looked liked eyes looking at me, twinkled. And my heart expanded and I believed. That was it.

I remember that day like it was yesterday. The exact date? Nope. But the fact that I asked for a sign and got a response was enough to convince me.

The people I knew who were Christians also practiced a literal religion; do what was spelled out in the Bible and all of life will go well.

I’ve never been very good at following people’s rules; I wonder, what about all the other possible responses? Click To Tweet

Learning to love Sabbath was one of those to-dos.

Where are you with practicing Sabbath?

Is it a burden? A religious convention meant for others to follow? An old-fashioned word that has little meaning in today’s immediate-oriented and production-driven culture?

My learning along the Way has shown me Sabbath is a gift of rest.

I tried to make it a ritual and hated it. I prepped all the meals the day before, I made sure all the clothes were ready for church the next day, I ran myself ragged in order to rest. I wanted Sabbath to be a wonderful practice but how I was approaching it wasn’t working. When I recognized it to be something to help me slow down, to notice God at work and take time to re-create, the meaning of Sabbath was transformed for me.

In my month of Showing Up I am trying to put into practice things I’ve attempted and dropped at various points in life. I invite you to join me in this week’s challenge. I’m going to sort through ideas and stuff to begin getting rid of what doesn’t fit anymore.  What ideas, what stories, what things, don’t work in this season of life?

The stories I tell myself, the items I hang on to, the clothes that I keep for that ‘someday’ are all going to be critiqued and evaluated; looking for what is valued, deemed worthy of keeping and what needs to be given away.

Practicing Sabbath rest has given me room for reflecting on what is important and what is no longer of value for me.

Are you willing to take inventory? Have you already made this a practice in your life? I’d love to hear how practicing Sabbath rest has opened up your awareness.

Thankful Thursdays

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I’ve been reading a pre-release copy of a friend’s new book and its gotten me thinking about words we use without giving them much thought or the weight they deserve. I’ll be writing more about the book itself later; for today the word I’ve been pondering is

I don’t know about you but if I pay attention during my day I have so many things to be thankful for. Most of the time they’re not things; a driver who waves me to go first in a parking lot, the smile of a stranger, the singing of birds in early morning light.

Practicing thankfulness isn’t hard if we’ve learned to slow down and pay attention in our moments.

That’s the hard thing isn’t it? We get so busy with our to-do lists we forget to look around at what’s happening when all goes smoothly. We don’t have a problem noticing when something isn’t going our way; or maybe that’s just me?

In any case, I’m challenging myself this month to show up in areas I’ve taken for granted.

Practicing thankfulness is one.

I spent the day today with our 3 year-old grand-daughter. We went to her local library to participate in the summer family events offered each week; both free and fun. I said YES to both of those. We had a fabulous time doing a red, white & blue craft, looking for books, participating in the Creation Station and attending the outdoor story hour with puppet show. Every step of the way I was present, enjoying following her lead, joining in with the play and picking books to read at home. She is a creative child with a fabulous imagination. She told stories in the car on the way home that had us both laughing. What’s not to be thankful for?

I don’t spend all my days with children anymore; between my education career, years of being an SAHM, and a homeschooling mom, I grew accustomed to all the joy & laughter children bring. I hadn’t realized how much I miss regular time with children. Spending time with the Grands is double fun; in a not so distant way, they are part of me.

Thankful.

In the 55 days I’m not visiting the Grands, I have a long list of thankful items too. I’ve discovered God loves to give me love gifts; reminders of His watching, considerate love for me. These love gifts often come in two very personal forms: hummingbirds and random hearts in nature. I’ve written about hummingbirds in the past; the sweet, tender mercy of God brings tears to my eyes when I recount the many times He has gifted me with eyes to see His abiding love for me.

Here along the trail

 or here in the sand

Years ago I was challenged to count the gifts after reading Ann Voskamp’s great book One Thousand Gifts. Give thanks is plopped in the middle of a list of to-dos that Paul penned to the church in Thessalonica. Here’s a part of that list:

Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

I love to think about ways to give thanks, to express gratitude for the many gifts I’ve been given; especially the gifts I didn’t call gifts when they arrived. Click To Tweet

As a coach I’ve worked a lot on my own growth mindset; working to see possibilities, rather than allowing the weight of hard things to bring me down.

I’ve learned the best method is to admit something is hard, acknowledge the challenge to grow through the hard stuff, and look for the potential benefits from walking through the hard times.

The most important aspect? Talk to a trusted person who listens without trying to fix what’s wrong.

I have learned to give thanks for little things that I used to gloss over. I’ve learned to capture photos of light through trees, random hearts discovered in nature, and most of all learning to speak words of thanks out loud to anyone who has gifted me in some way.

How have you learned to give thanks? How do you practice thankfulness?

Join me on Thursdays this month to capture a thankful. Use the hashtag #ThankfulThursday . We can count together! Who knows, maybe we’ll grow into thankful people?!

Summer Fun!

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I’ve been quiet on the blog for quite awhile. I’m such a word nerd; I love using quiet and quite in the same sentence. They gave me fits as a student, but I digress.

There was a protracted season of my life that was very hard (think grief, loss, ugly crying) whose good intent was to develop stillness. Like a child on a time out chair or one who has a secret, I didn’t sit still well. The season necessarily was extended until the stillness settled down, seeping into my soul. This became my way of being. A beautiful gift that was uninvited, undeserved and definitely rejected before being accepted.

I grew so enamored with the stillness that I withdrew from people in order to be quiet, to read, pray, and reflect. But like the Dead Sea which is dead because there is no outflow of water, I was stagnating in my own stillness. Not a pretty picture.

I sought outlets to serve; places to encourage, engage, uplift. There were glimmers of response but nothing shone bright enough to hold my attention. I was used to being alone now, had I lost how to be with people? Not this extrovert! I had lost my sense of place. I got quiet outside of myself because I began to believe a lie: I was not needed. My age & stage was sidelining me. Somehow I began to believe I was to grow content with looking at life in the review mirror rather than out ahead through the forward facing windshield.

I tell you these things that have made me sigh for months to set the stage for why I’m speaking up now.

As I’ve turned my face forward I’ve realized that I have a lot of ideas. I have a lot of connection points I’ve seen through this season, connections that are meant for others, not just me. I’m eager to share, to encourage, to point out resources, to create!

My raison d’être will be revealed through my words. I want you to be a part of the fun of discovery!

Here are my plans for the next 31 days.

Share

Have fun

Observe the World

Write Daily

Unpack big ideas

Post fun and engaging stuff here.

In other words: SHOW UP

 

I invite you to engage here and all the Social Media places. We’re going to have fun learning along the Way.

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